Everyone has dreams when they are young。
And mine came to an abrupt halt。
I changed as a man, as a person, my soul was damaged beyond repair。
So I turned into someone everyone would hate。
Because I hate everyone and everything。
I’m furious at the world。
I don’t see that changing anytime soon。
But then it does change。
And if there is one thing I am not good at, it’s adapting。
Hope, Bullseye’s daughter, jump starts my soul again。
I hate it。
I love it。
I need her。
But I can’t have her。
She’s my friend’s daughter, for one。
For two, she’s way too damn young for the likes of me。
Three? She’s got a kid。
And everyone knows how I feel about kids。
Vermin。 Loud。 Annoying。
Wonderful。 Beautiful。 Precious。
The voice inside my head is stupid。
It wants and wants but I won’t allow myself to have it。
I don’t deserve to have it。
There’s no hope for me。
Even if hope is staring me in the face。
I have to focus on me。 My business。 I’m on a case。
Women are dying。
And it’s all because of me。
I have to protect what I care about for once in my life。
I failed once and I refuse to do it again。
How can I love her, when hate is all I’ve ever known?